The CU, Waterloo Iowa

While enjoying a relaxing weekend away with friends in Cedar Falls, Iowa, we took a trip down the road to neighboring Waterloo for an evening of drinks and merriment. This is not the kind of restaurant one would expect to find in Middle of Nowhere, Iowa, let me tell you. The atmosphere is romantic, quiet, and intimate (which was immediately disrupted by myself, my friends, and our company). The food is exquisite, with a large variety of dishes on the menu, and the cocktails are to die for. Have a German Chocolate, or two, or three while you're there.

I could not have visited such a high class establishment without pooping. The restroom is a single, which was a good choice for a small scale venue with minimal patron traffic. There on a Saturday night, I experienced no wait for the restroom and no one standing outside to pressure me while I was performing. The space is well decorated, painted red with slate grey tiles and adorned with fine art by Picasso and Monet. A lovely cherry wood table with a fragrant floral arrangement is set up directly across from the toilet, providing the perfect space to leave one's coat or purse, and the perfect cover of any undesirable and lingering odor.

The toilet paper is basic two ply, which always knocks off a point in my book, but they truly redeem themselves with the foaming soap at their white pedestal sink. This restroom could definitely benefit from a full-length mirror, but this is one of very few setbacks to this lovely space.

The CU Restaurant, Waterloo, IA
rating: 8/10

Loring Pasta Bar

This is one of my absolute favorite restaurants. I pretty much have only good things to say about this place. It's unique, it's romantic, there's great atmosphere, great music, fantastic food, and a full bar. My only complaint is that their penchant for hiring hipster wait staff results in often slow service. Only go here if you don't have a time limit! Trust me, it's worth it.

The Loring Pasta Bar

Now, if you are the type who loves to escape from reality and step into an imaginary world where anything can happen, then this is the bathroom for you. Taking a shit at Loring Pasta Bar is like taking a shit in Narnia.



The bathroom is built out of sandy colored uneven brick and dimly lit by chandeliers and star lamps. Its wacky shape does not allow for standard sized stalls and the doors don't quite fit, giving that element of danger and the risk of an unsolicited peek at your goodies. Because the brick bathroom walls do not rise all the way to the ceiling, music, bar bustle, and conversation can be heard from inside the bathroom. This background noise creates the perfect cover up for any business you may be attending to.

The toilets are very standard, a bit of nostalgia from the days of high school bathroom gossip sessions. The bowl itself is white, with an industrial black seat. The toilet paper is two-ply and a bit rough, clearly a generic brand, but never once have i used this toilet without paper in full supply. In case of an emergency, there is a cabinet next to the hand-washing-zone full of paper products.

There are two mismatched sinks with huge shower head faucets and the soap dispensers produce foaming soap, which is always a treat. The restroom is always clean, with close attention paid to picking up any stray paper that makes its way on the floor so as not to tarnish the image of the mystical dream land.

All in all, this bathroom allows you to poop with 98% privacy in an immaculate fairytale world where you would not be surprised to see a unicorn washing his hooves at the sink next to you.

Rating: 9

Rock Bottom Brewery

At the request of many friends, family members, and co-workers, i am writing a review of Rock Bottom Minneapolis.


Let me begin by saying that the food is great, the beer is better, and the atmosphere is tops. This restaurant has the talent of providing a fantastic family dining experience, as well as a fun bar night with music, pool, and games.

If only the bathrooms could share this glowing review.

When first entering the ladies room you are blasted in the face with an unpleasant burst of air coming from the ceiling vent. The bathroom is tiled in red on the floor and half way up the walls, creating a cavernous echo effect, which amplifies the natural sounds that one could possibly be making during their upcoming intestinal release.

The restroom is separated into four stalls, one of which is handicap accessible. This is usually the stall of choice for a pooper, however, the toilet seat was loose, which was startling to say the least when i sat down. I quickly moved stalls and began the process. The bathroom itself is cold, uninviting, and awkwardly quiet, as the music in the restaurant is not piped into the bathroom. The pooper lives in fear of being walked in on, for in this all-too-personal space, nothing is sacred and all noises are heard. Two of the bathroom stalls are partially missing locks- succeeding in securing the door, but leaving a lock-sized peep hole through which to be exposed to any unsuspecting passers by. However, advertisements of upcoming Rock Bottom events provide for pleasurable reading to pass the time.

The toilet paper is two-ply, which is a plus, but not plush by any means. The sinks are very temperature-sensitive, so one must be very careful not to scald themselves while using the hot water. There are 4 mirrors and a small sinkless vanity to provide a space to gussy up without being in the way of hand washers. The towel dispensers are motion activated, and the bathroom door opens out into the hallway, eliminating the need to touch a door handle when exiting.

All in all this is a classic bar bathroom. It is often dirty, crowded, and full of unusual smells.

Rating: 4.5/10

Seven.

A friend of mine stopped in for drinks at Seven on Hennepin avenue last summer before seeing a show downtown. Though a little on the pricey side, the drinks are very well made and the atmosphere is beyond posh.

The drinks hadn't yet arrived and he could not stand the humiliation of having to leave a theater to drop the kids off at the pool, so he took a trip to the Seven restrooms for a much needed pit stop.

The bathroom was dimly lit, setting a sensual mood. Set up in a corridor-like style, it stretched about 7 feet long and spanned about 4 feet wide. The stalls are built with floor to ceiling doors effectively blocking sound as well as concealing the style of your footwear so as not to be identified as the pooper when re-entering the restaurant. The toilet paper provided is a soft, plush, absorbent two-ply, very pleasurable to wipe with. The air was filled with the soft lazy humming of a bathroom fan, like a mother's lullaby, muffling any embarrassing sounds. To complete the experience, a well dressed gentleman waits for you by the door with a soft clean towel to dry your hands before returning to your table.

James's Rating; 8.8/10

The Warren Tavern.

While visiting my family for the holidays I had a delightful meal and the best Bloody Mary in recent memory at The Warren Tavern in historic Charlestown, MA. The almost cabin-like tavern reeks of history and really good mashed potatoes and is the perfect spot for a cold beer or a hot plate of shepherd's pie.




Naturally, in this historic building, which was the hangout of such American greats as Paul Revere and George Washington, I had to poop where they once had.

The bathroom is small, barely accommodating two stalls and a rather tiny sink. Though i am certain the technology has advanced since the time of the founding fathers, this restroom does not seem to have kept up. Patrons are in uncomfortably close proximity to each other both while using the restroom and waiting in line to do so. All sounds seem to be amplified in this tiny space lit by harsh fluorescent ceiling lamps. However small and poorly lit, the bathroom is quite clean.

I would not recommend this as a poop spot for the faint of heart, only for those who are experienced, and somewhat shameless, like myself. However, because i tend to enjoy a sense of danger when i poop, i rather like the conditions at the Warren Tavern.

Rating: 5/10

The Warren Tavern

The Bad Waitress.

On Monday, January 5th, I enjoyed an omelet and a beer with friends at The Bad Waitress Diner on Eat Street in Minneapolis. The atmosphere is a fun mixture of bad ass biker and pinup retro and the food is sensational.

After finishing my spinach, mushroom, and brie omelet, i felt the call of duty.

This bathroom had all of the characteristics that create a top notch public pooping experience. The single-toilet restroom was dimly lit and decorated in an almost Tuscan style with earth tones and mosaic tiles. Sink and mirror placement was ideal, kitty-corner to the toilet so that you do not have to look at yourself while in action. The toilet itself was rose colored and spotlessly clean. Toilet paper was fully stocked, with extra rolls within easy reach. Because the diner was not crowded, there was no one in line for the bathroom or waiting outside the door, providing discomfort and pressure. The space was large enough for effective dissipation of smell, and air freshening spray was also provided.

Rating: 8.5/10
Cudos, Bad Waitress.

Oh Come, All Ye Poopers.

Welcome to The Poop Spot.

This is a blog devoted to bringing you up to speed with the latest reviews on the best restaurant and public bathrooms for pooping in and around the Twin Cities Metro.

Please feel free to share your thoughts and, of course, your experiences. I love a good poop story.

Every poop counts.